Pig Planet: The Adventures of Baozi and Ace

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AldenM1
Supporter in '21

Post   » Thu Oct 10, 2013 2:43 pm


Ace's lips are awesome.

I am no expert, but I know that Snickers was bummed and lonely immediately after Charlie's death. He was way more cuddly and clingy and chewed on the bars etc. I liked the cuddly, but it wasn't fair to leave him lonely because I liked being snuggled! So we got Ouiser just over a week after Charlie died. I don't think pigs philosophize as much as we do: they just know [friend here] or [friend not here].

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pigwidgeon

Post   » Fri Oct 11, 2013 10:18 am


Jaycey, I read Toki's thread and I can sympathize so much. One of the toughest things about losing Baozi was how sudden and unexpected it was.

Making my video actually helped me in a way. I watch it every day to remind me of my sweet girl and how much joy she brought into my life. I only had her for nine months, but it feels like so much longer yet so much shorter at the same time. I thought she would be with me for years. :'(

I have considered getting a friend for Ace sometime in the future, but it won't be for a while because of... well, it's a long story but essentially my Mom is taking Baozi's loss very hard, does not deal with grief very well, and has become vehemently anti-pet these days. Even though I am theoretically a grown adult and it's ultimately my decision, since I live here, I'd really rather let some time pass and hopefully she will be more reasonable.

My Dad and I have reached the point of focusing on the happy times with Baozi and celebrating her life, but my Mom is still fixated on the end of her life and will not stop obsessing over it. I tried to get her to watch my video (since it helped me) but she refuses. I really don't know what to do for her. I suggested a grief counselor but she refuses that too. But I think her approach is really unhealthy and is keeping me from moving on, too. I don't know that I can ever forgive myself for not being able to save Baozi, but nobody could have loved her more than I did, and that will have to be enough. I have to come to terms with it somehow, and my Mom's reaction is making that difficult.

I know some of you here have lost your piggies. Do you have any advice for me?

I still miss Baozi so much. I still am afraid that I will forget all the little details of her I remember so clearly now. I'm glad I recorded so many videos of the pigs while I ramble on in the background about all the little things they do. Those videos will be what keeps Baozi's memory alive. Nothing will ever replace her. A new piggy will be just that--a new little life to care for and love. But Baozi will always be special and she will always be my Sweetie girl, and I will never forget that.

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Jaycey
Supporter in 2014

Post   » Fri Oct 11, 2013 11:53 am


I know the feeling pigwidgeon. When I lived at home, after each loss my parents both said "no more". I did try to explain to them that it made me feel better if I could give another piggy a home but they didn't listen.

In the end I just got another piggy without their "permission". Mum accepted it, but things were usually a bit tense with my dad for a few days/weeks, then he got over it.

I don't suggest you to do that though.

I can only suggest that you keep trying. Tell your mom how you feel and how it would help both you and Ace if there was another piggy around.

There's a link of GL somewhere (I think) about grieving, it might be worthwhile printing that out and passing to your mom to read. It's very unhealthy to ignore it. Grieving sucks but we all have to do it. I hate breaking down over Toki but it happens (I'm filling up typing this) and we need to let it happen so we can move on.

It's especially tough the first time. If I mention my first pig, Gordy, to my mum I can guarantee she'll say "He was the best" and she always gets sad.

Good luck pigwidgeon, and hugs to you, Ace and your mom.

C Cole-Chakotay

Post   » Fri Oct 11, 2013 1:00 pm


Hello, Ace! What a nice tribute for Baozi.

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pigwidgeon

Post   » Mon Oct 14, 2013 9:32 am


I can't believe it's been a week since I lost my sweetie girl. It feels like so much longer. I had a moment of sadness tonight as I watched Castle (with Ace on the bed next to me) because I was watching that show the last time Baozi sat up in the corner of the cage and looked at me. I miss her so much. I often look at her little paw prints on the slab of clay that the crematorium gave to me. I say goodnight to her every night. I wish I had one more chance to kiss her little nose or pet the soft tuft of fur on her head. I still remember her so vividly and hope there is never a day that the memories fade and become vague.

I feel that it would help my grief (and Ace's) to adopt a new friend, but my Mom is being a major thorn in my side. Do you guys think Ace will fare OK being a lone pig for a while? I figure the only way she'll ever get a friend is if I a) move out or b) just get the pig anyway and deal with my Mom being angry for weeks, both of which can't happen until I work something out. So far, I've been giving Ace extra cuddles and having her sit with me every night while I watch TV or work on the computer. I was also going to put a stuffed toy in the cage for her.

My Mom is not a rational person so rational discussion is right out. I know, I've tried. She's not going to come around.

Right now I am looking for ways to move out as soon as possible, which is difficult since, you know, I lost my job. I might end up leaving the country (teaching in South Korea looks appealing, since I'll have a job and apartment provided for me, and I don't want to stay here) and am working out the logistics of taking my piggies with me. My piggies are one of the few sources of joy in my life right now and I don't want to give them up, particularly since when I leave, I'll be in a foreign country with no one I know and no other support system. One of the things I looked forward to most after graduation was pet ownership and I don't want to put it off further. I've seen people on the board travel overseas with piggies so I know it's possible.

So yeah everything is kind of a mess right now so if anyone has any advice or suggestions, it'd be much appreciated.

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Jaycey
Supporter in 2014

Post   » Tue Oct 15, 2013 3:33 am


I think Ace should be okay for a while. Keep a close eye on her, keep weighing her to make sure she's still eating. Keep doing as you're doing, interact with her as much as possible, and give her lots of things to do when you're not there.

I hope your Mom can see sense soon.

Good luck!

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pigwidgeon

Post   » Tue Oct 15, 2013 7:35 am


My Mom cannot see sense. She is physically incapable of it. I tried to explain that piggies are social animals and fare better with a friend, and she cites all the ignorant owners who buy just one from a pet store as proof that they're fine. I overheard her talking to my Dad (who actually treats me like an adult and was trying to explain that as adult I can get my own pet) that she's practicing some "tough love" and "teaching me to be strong" because "you can't buy a child a new present every time something sad happens or it will make the child weak and spoil them."

I am 200% done. I'm moving out as soon as I can find a new job, which seems extremely bleak at the moment. I'm just sorry poor Ace has to suffer in the meantime. I underestimated the depth of my mother's delusions when I first adopted the pigs and thought that if I took full responsibility for them, both financially and care-wise, that I would be treated like an adult. Turns out I was wrong. After all, getting a new friend for a social animal isn't looking out for an animal's welfare, it's being a weak and spoiled child/getting myself a present!

I'm so furious right now I can't even type anymore. I need to go play a violent video game or something. Jaycey, thanks for your reply.

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NoCableisSafe

Post   » Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:02 am


I am sorry that it has become clear the reason your mother doesn't want you to get Ace a companion isn't because she is too upset to consider it, but because she seems to think it's like replacing an old mobile which breaks when you already had two.

I tried to come up with a positive intent: perhaps she believes you are so full of grief that you've decided to avoid that grief by masking it behind the joy of adopting another pet. Perhaps she did not like to see you fighting with Baozi only to lose her. I'm really not sure but it is quite difficult to realise if what she is saying is what she means or if she's trying to come up with a "good" reason which isn't the true reason. I can understand your frustration, though.

I hope you're able to find a resolution to this. If it helps, if Ace is still eating well and you're spending time with her she won't suffer from being alone for a while.

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Jaycey
Supporter in 2014

Post   » Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:16 am


I'm so sorry pigwidgeon! I can totally see your frustration. Pigs are just like toys eh?!

My parents didn't understand the relationship between me and my pigs, and between the pigs themselves. No matter how hard I tried it didn't work.

I really wish there was so advice I could give, but there's nothing I can offer really. A stubborn parent is the worst.

One thing I'd like to point out though, Ace isn't suffering. She's got you and you're an "ace" piggy mom. She's lucky to have you, and you'll make sure she's cared for in the best possible way through this cruddy situation.

Good luck with your choices, and feel free to post on here as often as you want. I wish there was something I could do to help.

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Lynx
Celebrate!!!

Post   » Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:25 am


Read www.guinealynx.info/.html Weigh your pig daily right now. If you see any signs of depression, weight loss, see if you can point her to the companionship page here. www.guinealynx.info/.html Note that in Sweden, it is illegal to buy only one guinea pig (unless you already have one).

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pigwidgeon

Post   » Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:29 am


Thanks for your replies, Jaycey. I want to move out due to other personal issues I have with my Mom, but this is just the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak. I don't appreciate being thought of a child. I'm not sure if that makes me angrier than her thinking piggies are "presents."

Ace pig watched Sleepy Hollow with me tonight. I joke that it's her favorite show, but she really seems more interested in her hay, treats, and naps than the show. :p She does get a lot of cuddles when she watches TV with me, though. She's much easier to cuddle outside of the cage. She's still quite skittish inside the cage.

I have noticed that she is wheeking a bit more often now (like, wheeking at all). When Baozi was alive, Ace was a mostly silent piggy. But lately I've heard a few wheeks. I wonder what it means.

I worry a bit b/c she no longer purrs and vibrates when I pet her and rub her belly. She used to be a serial purr-er. I wonder if she's missing her friend.

I was going to knit another guinea pig for the cage. This might be a kind of dumb question, but is it safe to use acrylic yarn? I was worried what might happen if Ace chewed it. I plan on using black yarn for the eyes instead of buttons for that reason. If natural fibers are safer, I could try to hunt down some cotton yarn (good luck finding wool in hawaii lolol).

Ace being fascinated by my TV show:

Image
Last edited by pigwidgeon on Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:33 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Lynx
Celebrate!!!

Post   » Tue Oct 15, 2013 9:31 am


I posted just above your post (you were likely writing when I posted).

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