Snickerspants Vol. 7: A New Day

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AldenM1
Supporter in '16

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 12:00 am


Well WE had a busy weekend.

I headed north for a secret rendezvous with my supplier, SlaveToFuzzy. A few weeks ago she decided we needed to meet a young man named Steve who had been found wandering around wild in the hostile wilderness of Atlanta. After some detoxing, fattening up, and a little visit with Dr. A to leave behind some man-bits, Steve was finally ready to audition for the role of SuperHerd Boar (and we all know those are some pretty big shoes to fill).

At first, things seemed to be going okay. Everybody was very interested in the exciting exotic hay, which was of course exactly the hay they had just had in their cage. But we all know hay is much more delicious on the floor.

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I was a little worried, actually, that Steve seemed to be bonding with The Ladies and sort of missing the point of his entire existence.

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But then it happened. The one moment that changed everything. And I caught it on camera.

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Yes, ladies and germs, there it was. Steve had humped Cookie; Cookie brrrred at him and waddled off. He'd humped Cici, who whined what was almost a scream, but not quite (not yet!). And then... then he humped VickieWhiskers.

And Miss Victoria Whiskers does not, in case you were wondering, play that.

Please imagine the next three hours consisting of Cookie placidly eating hay, but with one eye carefully on Vickie, just in case, because the negative energy was that strong. Please imagine Miss Clairee Claudia huddled in whatever corner she could find, often face-first, periodically breaking into hysterical screaming, whether or not anybody was anywhere near her or taking any notice of her at all. And please imagine Miss VickieWhiskers, bristling with rage, for HOURS, sometimes pacing off and seeming like she had calmed down -- but then coming right back and reminding everyone that no, no, she had NOT calmed down, SHE DOES NOT PLAY THAT.

Steve did everything right. He froze. He averted his eyes. He apologized in every pig way I could see. And he tried hard to figure out the rules, including figuring out the ramp faster than I've ever seen any pig figure it out. Not that he was allowed to get OFF the ramp, mind you.

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But it just didn't end. Vickie kept rumbling him into corners and reading him the riot act.

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And then, when he didn't apologize loudly or long or fast enough, she'd nip him.

After hours of random outbreaks of VickieOutrage and a nip that finally drew blood, I decided to call it quits. I reinstalled the floor on the upper level and, since it was 2am, created a kind of stopgap fleece cover for the ramp-hole. And we all went to bed.

Of course the stopgap fleece cover didn't provide sufficient deterrence for a VERY. UPSET. young sow who wasn't sure what the hell was going on but was pretty sure she wasn't liking any of it.

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"Don't make me scream again. I can and I will, and the neighbors are already getting ready to call the cops."

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And for much of this morning she just seemed really jumpy and Steve seemed tired and confused. But by this afternoon, things seemed much better. Steve even humped Cici a couple of times and she told him to get off without completely losing her mind. And she has some other lessons to teach him, too.

For example, here she is explaining that his job is to pull the hay out of the bin for her, and then allow her to take it out of his mouth.

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So I think we'll all survive. Maybe in a couple of weeks, if The Ladies are feeling up to it, we'll try again. But for now we'll just have two happy teams. And in the meantime, we have a new guy!

"I'm Steve!"
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daisymay
Supporter 2016-2017

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 12:30 am


Hello Steve, welcome to the girls! You're a handsome fellow! You made me laugh, I felt I was really there as I read your story. Well written. More updates when you can.

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goosey1019

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 12:41 am


I'm a big fan of the new couple. :) Although Cookie's face in that ramp photo is just priceless. But yeah, Miss Cici stretching for that hay has just cemented her has my new favorite pig in the would be super herd.

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AldenM1
Supporter in '16

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 1:01 am


Cookie has always had an expressive face in photos. I love that picture a lot too!

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clairey

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 6:05 am


Oh bless Cookie, she just wants a peaceful life! I'm sure in a few days Cici won't even stand up or stop chewing when Steve decides she needs a quick squashing. Way back when Stephen met Bobs, Bobs spent a couple of days screaming like a demented dog's squeaky toy.

I can't wait to get to know Steve. He looks a confident pig. I like that he tried to apologise and back down to VW as best he could rather than jump straight into battle mode.

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Lynx
RESIST

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 8:07 am


Steve is a cutie! A wonderful guy who will surely learn his Place in The World.

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AldenM1
Supporter in '16

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 12:00 pm


Hey now, Clairey! I have a demented dog who is obsessed with squeaky toys! And, yeah, that's actually a relatively accurate description of what Cici did all Saturday evening. Sigh.

GrannyJu1
Armcavy

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 12:13 pm


Loved the story. LOVE the pigs! Hooray for the super herd (?).

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snowflakey
E's Moriarity

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 3:52 pm


Whoop! Fantastic! I love Steve. He'll be Top Pig in short order: as soon as he learns what the ladies expect from him and he delivers!

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AldenM1
Supporter in '16

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 5:20 pm


Well, for now he's only got Cici to be top pig of, and she's more than willing to surrender if he leaves her alone. And from what I saw on the pigcam today, his order of business has been: popcorn, popcorn, snack, popcorn, make roommate scream, popcorn, quick nap. Which is about as good as I can ask, I think.

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snowflakey
E's Moriarity

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 6:01 pm


Sounds like he is having a great time in the new home. :-)

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clairey

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 7:14 pm


I can only imagine the stink eye VickieWhiskers is giving her ceiling every time he popcorns across the top floor.

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GP_mum
Supporter in '13

Post   » Mon Feb 29, 2016 9:11 pm


A warm welcome to Steve, and fingers crossed that he'll eventually accepted by Ms Vikkie Whiskers. Great photos of the whole introduction excitement.

Maddy_harper

Post   » Tue Mar 01, 2016 1:21 am


congrats.

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Breadfan4

Post   » Tue Mar 01, 2016 7:48 pm


Very well documented introductions - you write so vividly! I'm sure Steve will settle in just fine...was there any type of idea given as to how old he is? I know you mentioned he was found outside, but...

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AldenM1
Supporter in '16

Post   » Wed Mar 02, 2016 1:12 am


Yeah, he's a youngun, right smack in puberty.

GrannyJu1
Armcavy

Post   » Wed Mar 02, 2016 1:17 am


Oh joy! ;o)

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clairey

Post   » Wed Mar 02, 2016 5:31 am


The perfect age for Cici to train up! ;)

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AldenM1
Supporter in '16

Post   » Thu Mar 03, 2016 12:47 pm


Steve has a natural talent. I didn't solicit this in any way the first time. But I've been encouraging it because it's ADORABLE. I hope I can eventually encourage it into a little spin before he gets his treat!

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mmeadow
Supporter 2004-2017

Post   » Thu Mar 03, 2016 12:49 pm


Awww!

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